Family

Dealing with Your Parents’ Separation or Divorce

Family Health Mental Health Parents

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Parents split up because of problems in their relationship. It is not your fault.

Every year in BC, thousands of married and common-law couples stop living together. This is called separation. When married people separate, their marriage isn’t legally ended yet. They still have to get a divorce to legally end their marriage. But before that, they need to make important decisions, especially if there are children.

They have to decide:

  • How much time with each parent, and other important people, spend with the children?
  • How will they support the children?
  • How will they make important decisions about the children?
  • How will they divide the things they own?

You aren't alone

It's completely normal to feel a mix of emotions when your parents split. Your feelings are valid, even if they're painful. It can be really tough with all the changes. You have the right to share your thoughts and ideas about things that affect you because your voice is important.

You aren't alone and you will get through this. There are lots of people, resources and services there to help you when things are tricky at home.

 

Dig Deeper

Go to the Teens or Kids guides of FamiliesChange.ca for tips and resources on how to cope with your parents separating. 

 

Get help

Get resource or connect with counsellors at KidsHelpPhone.ca. Text CONNECT to 686868 to access confidential support

Dig Deeper

Information for children and teens from FamilyLawinBC.ca has information on family law issues most commonly asked by children and teens.

What Rights and Responsibilities Do I have at the Age...

International Rights of the Child 

UN Convention on the Right of the Child that apply to you up until you are 18. All children have the right

  • Not to be discriminated against
  • To live, be safe and develop to your fullest potential
  • To have a voice heard and respected in decisions that impact you
  • To have adults make decisions about you that are in your best interest

Dig deeper in Kids have rights!

Becoming an Adult

The age of majority is 19 in BC. This means once you turn 19 you are considered an adult. You can now make your own decisions in most situations including medical care, legal matters and finances. 

Consent to Sexual Activity

People must generally be at least 16 to be able to legally agree to sexual activity. But if 16 or 17 years old, you can only consent to sexual activity if the other person is not in a position of authority or trust and there is no exploitation or dependency.
 

Driver's License

Once you turn 16 you are able to apply for a driver’s license. If you are under 19 you will need a parent or guardian’s permission to apply.

See Getting my driver’s license
 

Go to school

All kids between 5 and up until 16 years old must attend school. Most kids go to public school but there are private schools and home school options. 

Have a Voice

Adults making decisions about you should take your views seriously, even if they might not always be able to do exactly what you want. 

This right becomes especially important if your parents are separating or you are in the government’s care. You have the right to express your views on things that impact your life. See Your Rights in Care: What You Need to Know and Dealing with Your Parents’ Separation or Divorce.

Get a job

Age 14-15: You can get a job (with parent/caregiver permission) but your employer can only ask you to do “light work”. If your employer wants you to do anything other than light work, they will need special permission from the government. 

Learn more at Working 101.

Consent to Medical Treatment

In B.C., there is no exact age when a child can give consent. If you are under 19 but your doctor thinks you understand what the treatment means, you can choose to say yes or no to medical care, even if your parents or guardians disagree.

See When can I make my own medical decisions?

Working under the age of 14

Under the age of 14 an employer needs special permission permission from your parent or guardian and from the government to hire you. There are special rules for kids working as actors. 

Dig deeper at Working 101.

Consent to sex with partners close in age

Age 14 and 15: You can consent to sexual activity with someone no more than 5 years older as long as the older person is not in a position of authority or trust and there is no exploitation or dependency.

Get a Lawyer (non criminal)

The Child & Youth Legal Centre can provide legal advice, information, and representation for children and youth in a number of areas including child protection, family law, and human rights. Call: 778-657-5544 or toll free at 1-877-462-0037

 

Be charged with a crime

12–17: Once you turn 12 you can be charged with a crime. Until you turn 18, you will be dealt with under the Youth Criminal Justice Act if accused of a crime. Learn more at YCJA.ca.

Voting

The minimum age Canadian citizens can vote in municipal, provincial or federal elections is 18. 

Consent to sex with a partner close in age

A 12 or 13 year old can consent to sexual activity with someone no more than 2 years older. The older person cannot be in a position of authority or trust (like a camp counselor or coach) and there must not be any exploitation of the younger person or dependency on the older person (like they are providing them with a place to stay).
 

Can be sentenced as an adult

If you are 14 or older and you are found guilty of a serious crime the judge can give you an adult sentence.

Register for List of Future Votes

The minimum age Canadian citizens can vote in municipal, provincial or federal elections is 18. If you are 16 or 17 you can register on the List of Future Voters which will automatically register you to vote when you turn 18. You can learn more about registering to the Future Voter list at Elections BC.
 

Babysitting

There is no law setting out the minimum age for babysitting in BC. However, babysitting courses are typically only offered to children who are at least 11 years old. There is also a BC Supreme Court case which stated that children under 10 should not be left unsupervised. 

Tattoos and Piercings

No minimum age for tattoos or piercings, however businesses can set a minimum age or require parental consent.

See Tattoos and Piercings: What You Need to Know

Right to a Lawyer

If you’re a youth in BC who’s been arrested, you have the right to speak to a lawyer. You also have rights under the Youth Criminal Justice Act to talk to your parents or another trusted adult, and to have them along with a lawyer in the room with you if you choose to talk to police. 

To contact a free lawyer, call Legal Aid at 604-408-2172 (Greater Vancouver) or 1-866-577-2525 (elsewhere in BC).

Access School Records

Students have rights of access to their own records. Parents also have the right to access their school aged child’s records. 

Make a Will

You must be at least 16 years old to make a will in BC. 

Get Married with Parent/Guardian Permission

If you are 16, 17 or 18 you’ll need parent or guardian permission to get married. Under 16, a judge will have to give an order saying it's okay for you to get married. 

Donate Blood

You have to be at least 17 to donate blood in Canada. There are other requirements you must meet to be eligible. Figure out if you are eligible: Am I eligible to donate blood?

Change Your Name

Once you turn 19 you can change your name without needing your parent or guardian's permission. However, if you are younger than 19 years old and a parent with custody of your child, you may apply for a legal change of name for yourself and/or your child without consent of your parent(s).

Rent a Place to Stay 

There is no minimum age when someone can enter into a rental agreement, but a landlord can decide not to rent to someone because of their age if they are under 19.

See Leaving Home Before 19.

Buying alcohol, cigarettes or marijuana, lottery tickets, and gambling 

You are an adult and now have the responsibility of making decisions in your own best interest.

Treated as an Adult by the Criminal Justice System

If you are accused of a crime after you turn 18, your case will be governed by adult criminal procedures. You no longer have many of the special protections afforded to youth. 

Join the Military with Parent/Guardian Consent

Most of the time you have to be at least 17 to join the military but some 16 year olds may be eligible to enroll as an Officer. Either way you'll need parent/Guardian consent. 

Work without needing permission

You don’t need parent permission to work once you are 16, but until you turn 18, you aren’t allowed to do “hazardous work” like logging.

See Working 101.
 

Apply for an Adult Passport

You must be at least 16 years old to apply for an adult passport. You can find the application here.

Join the Military without Parent/Guardian Consent

People 18 or older do not need permission from their parents or guardians to join the military. 

Organ Donation

People of any age can register to be organ donors but if you are under 19 you need a parent/guardian sign on your behalf.